Damn

The week stretches on and on and on... my attempts at going home early this week have failed miserably. Two farewell dinners over the last two days. Not a good sign. People you know keep leaving this place, and it is becoming more and more difficult to meet new people. This sucks. But that's the way it is. Also, my attempts at reducing my alcohol intake are not quite hitting home. I dont remember forcing others to drink when I drink, so why do they keep doing that to me? Oh wait. I do 'persuade' people once in a while. Anyhoo.

It is not a good day today. I want to curl up in a ball and hide under my duvet and not have to deal with the world. I am feeling cold in office, and my head is pounding. Beginning to feel a bit giddy too. I asked the boss if I could take the rest of the day off and he started interrogating me on why I am not well and where I will see the doctor and whatnot. Aarrrgghhh. I will dial in for the telecon, and I will attend the meeting tomorrow, and I will still be reachable on the phone? Cant you let me go and rest for one afternoon?

It is not just the cold and headache that's bringing me down... some other things are running through my head. I am trying hard (or maybe not!) to stop all of it, but it just doesnt work. Damn the complications of life and people and emotions. Damn it all. I hate these crests and troughs where I switch from elated to upset ever so often. I wish for the numb doldrums.

I think I should go home and sleep.